We all encounter challenging discussions, not only with those close to us but also with landlords, bosses, and doctors. These interactions can significantly impact your life, whether sharing health concerns with a doctor or discussing your abilities in a job interview. Yet, many of us lack guidance on handling these conversations effectively. You might leave these talks wishing you had prepared better or been more open.
Common Challenging Conversations
Below are examples of tricky situations you might face, along with suggestions on language to use to build confidence.
Declining a Bridesmaid Request
“I am so honored. I am currently in a financially strained situation. If I were to be in your bridal party, I would want to do it right. If buying a dress or anything similar isn’t necessary, I would be thrilled to participate in some capacity.”
— Stacey Vanek Smith, NPR’s Global Economics Correspondent
Ending Therapy
“Do you need to process this ending? If so, you should prioritize this for yourself. Being selfish in this way doesn’t make you narcissistic. You must put your needs first. Therapists are trained to manage such conversations. If it doesn’t go well, they need to reconsider their training.”
— Moraya Seeger DeGeare, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
Discussing Sexual Health with a New Partner
“I recommend sharing your own status, including when you were last tested, what for, and the results. Avoid using the term ‘clean.’ Finally, ask, ‘How about you?’ to invite dialogue.”
— Dr. Evalene Dacker
Job Interview Nerves
“Think of three main points you want the interviewer to remember about you. If you struggle to answer a question, steer the conversation back to one of these key points.”
— Cynthia Pong, Embrace Change
Negotiating Medical Bills
“I am calling to address this bill and aim to resolve it today. I have a $1,000 bill, and I wanted to check if there’s a settlement amount available if I pay immediately.”
— Jared Walker, Dollar For
When a Doctor Ignores Your Symptoms
“This is a warning sign. Take control by saying, ‘Let’s discuss my symptoms. Did you hear me? These issues are affecting my life and work. I need your help.’ Putting it in context of your daily life may help. If not, finding another doctor is crucial.”
— Dr. Jennifer Mieres
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